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lynx-dev LYNX: joke (m$)


From: David Combs
Subject: lynx-dev LYNX: joke (m$)
Date: Sun, 11 Apr 1999 23:02:32 -0700 (PDT)


Bill Gates died in a car accident. He found himself in Purgatory being
sized up by God...

"Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call. I'm not sure whether to
send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by
putting a computer in almost every home in the world, and yet you
created that ghastly Windows 95. I'm going to do something I've never
done before. In your case, I'm going to let you decide where you want
to go!"

Bill replied, "Well, thanks, God. What's the difference between the
two?"

God said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly if it will
help you make a decision."

"Fine, but where should I go first?"

God said, "I'm going to leave that up to you."

Bill said, "OK, then, let's try Hell first." So Bill went to Hell. It
was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters. There were
thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the water,
laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining, the temperature was
perfect. Bill was very pleased. "This is great!" he told God. "If this
is Hell, I REALLY want to see Heaven!"

"Fine," said God and off they went. Heaven was a high place in the
clouds, with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was
nice but not as enticing as Hell.

Bill thought for a quick minute and rendered his decision. "Hmm, I
think I prefer Hell," he told God.

"Fine," retorted God, "as you desire." So Bill Gates went to Hell.

Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see
how he was doing in Hell. When God arrived in Hell, he found Bill
shackled to a wall, screaming amongst the hot flames in a dark cave. He
was being burned and tortured by demons.

"How's everything going, Bill?" God asked.

Bill responded - his voice full of anguish and disappointment, "This is
awful, this is not what I expected. I can't believe this happened. What
happened to that other place with the beaches and the beautiful women
playing in the water?"

God says, "That was just the screen saver."


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