Please join me in saying
good-bye....
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend by the name of
Common Sense who has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long
ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valued lessons as
knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the
worm and that life isn't always fair.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more
than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not kids, are
in charge, and wants do not equal needs ). His health began to rapidly
deteriorate when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set
in place.
The report of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for
kissing a classmate, a teen suspended from school for using mouthwash
after lunch, and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student,
only worsened his condition. It declined even further when schools were
required to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student but could
not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have
an abortion.
Finally, Common sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments
became contraband, churches became businesses and criminals received
better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to realize
that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, spilled it in her lap, and was
awarded a lot of money.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his
wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima Whiner.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.